In the vast and chaotic wilderness of software development, we encounter an unassuming creature: Mike. A developer of moderate skill and great enthusiasm, he is known less for mastery and more for his valiant attempts to tackle challenges well above his ability. Despite frequent setbacks, he remains a curious and persistent participant in the coding ecosystem. Mike is an active member of the JavaScript Breakpoint, a space where developers gather to share knowledge, debate best practices, and collectively panic about the latest JavaScript framework they’ve never heard of. He manages to survive here by carefully regurgitating half-remembered blog posts, other people’s opinions, and the ramblings of ChatGPT. He has been known to tentatively approach technologies like Deno and Bun, and spend hours of dedicated focus debugging type clashes after overenthusiastic refactoring. His relationship with types is best described as ranging from ‘it’s complicated’ to existential crises over whether any is really that bad.